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SEP–DEC 2022 THE REVIEW | 17 FEATURE “I wish every child who has extra needs could have a Donna walking beside them.” – Ella Grant my teacher aide and now my support worker for 20 years. Having strangers come into our home and support me has always been a big challenge for Mum and Dad, so once we find people that fit with our values and our tikanga, we don’t let them go. Donna started supporting the whānau when I was about four years old by coming into the hospital so Mum and Dad could have a break, or helping out around the house. Gradually she started learning to do more things for me like using the machines that help keep my airway clear and provide nutrition, giving me medication, doing my stretches with me. She started to recognise when I was having seizures and could tell when I was getting sick. By the time Mum and Dad started thinking about getting me off to school, Donna knew me just about as well as they did, with the added bonus of knowing what their dreams and aspirations were for me, what was acceptable and what was not in the way people talked to me and how they treated me. One of Donna’s many super powers was her ability to connect with people and find allies who would stand with us to ensure I had equity within the school system. Like the cherry picker incident… when it came time for the graduation ceremony at the end of the year Donna and my friends realised that the certificates were being presented up on the stage, which had no ramp. It was suggested that someone could come down and shake my hand and pass the certificate over, but my friends wouldn’t have it. The school had to hire a cherry picker and Donna and I rose up through the air in front of all those people and Donna pushed my chair over so WE could get our graduation certificate. Going through all those schools, doing the things we did, demanding the things we had every entitlement to, took courage. She gives me strength and I give her strength. I wish every child who has extra needs could have a Donna walking beside them. In the five years since we left school we have been on many adventures. I have had several jobs she has supported me at, we have spoken at a couple of conferences about disability where both of our experiences have been the subject of our talk (mine go on the overhead projector) and we travel to do training courses regularly, sometimes for her and sometimes for me. On a day-to-day basis Donna gets me up out of bed in the morning, helps me shower and get ready for the day. I’ve got house stuff to do that Donz helps me with like keeping my room clean, washing and hoovering. Above: Donna started supporting the whānau when Ella was around four years old. Opposite top: Ella and Donna says they are lucky to have each other. I do a music class, dance/ exercise programme or a sensory activity during the week, with lunch or a cuppa afterwards with friends. In between that we hang out in our community a bit, folding the village news pamphlets at the community office while catching up on the gossip. Something that I love about Donna is that she doesn’t let people tell her how “special” she is because she supports me. She tells them that we’re lucky to have each other, and I think that’s true. Ella, her mum Lorraine, and Donna shared such a beautiful story with The Review, but we didn’t have space to publish it all. To read more about the special connection between Donna and Ella’s whānau, go to www.tinyurl.com/amf2e3ah